The debt lifestyle: conquering the crabs for financial freedom

Julie Murphy • August 24, 2011

How many of us were trained to think that debt was a part of our modern-day lifestyle? When everyone around us has jumped in the pool of easy credit and quick financial “fixes”, it’s hard for anyone to immediately see the actual downside of this lifestyle choice.

We have such a casual attitude about debt in our society. Our student loans were for higher education, which is an investment into our future. Car loans are necessary because we all need transportation, right? And weren’t these the things that were supposed to help us achieve financial freedom?

Yet with all those justifications floating around, our debt still gives us a very constant feeling of guilt that we just can’t shake. We don’t have true financial freedom when we’re hampered down with unnecessary bills. The culture of debt resignation (we need debt just to maintain so we have to just accept it in our lives) is set. But where does this stem? Most likely, it’s coming from the people closest to you.

Family, friends, co-workers, bosses: who’s to blame?

Admit it: no matter what place in life you’re in, a part of you needs some sort of acceptance from those closest to you. You want your parents to be proud so you go to the best college you can. Your spouse absolutely loved that house that was over your price-point, but you sign the mortgage anyway for the sake of their happiness. And what’s a night out with your friends without drinks and dinner, even if you have to charge it in order to go.

In an effort to make the people closest to us happy – and to feel accepted as a part of something – we bend our financials until they break. And then we’re left wondering how it got so bad? You are partly to blame for making those decisions in the first place, but it’s fair to say that other’s “encouraged” your choices along the way.

The crabs in your bucket

Have you ever felt pressured by your boss to attend a conference that you’ll get reimbursed for weeks or months after it’s over? Or do you feel obligated to follow the financial advice of your parents give even though you know it’s probably not right for you? How about letting your friends pressure you into buying something as a treat that you can’t exactly afford?

We all have crabs in our bucket, and sometimes they can be the people who really do mean well. We all need debt to make it, and they surely feel that way. So, of course, you need to pick up a few credit cards along the way for survival as well. But it doesn’t have to be that way. Instead of continuing to pile on the debt on the advice of your family and friends, make it a point to change your habits.
What will you do today that will rewire your resignation to debt?

Sign up for my weekly words of wisdom (in the top right-hand corner of your screen) for encouraging thoughts each Tuesday. And be sure to check out my book, The Emotion Behind Money, for guidance and healing. You can take control of your finances, and I can help you.

Tags: financial freedom, crabs in your bucket, the debt lifestyle, living in debt, debt consolidation, student loan debt, credit card debt, debt relief, Julie Murphy, emotion behind money

Share Blog On Social

A woman is smiling while money is falling around her.
Image of budget planning worksheets
A sign that says join julie on youtube
A book titled the spiritual laws of money
Get it NOW!

Recent Blogs


By Julie Murphy December 10, 2025
Reset Your Money Energy for 2026 Every December, we all feel that pull, the desire to “be better with money next year.” But here’s the secret I’ve seen again and again after nearly three decades of walking alongside people from all walks of life: Financially wealthy people don’t just plan their next year — they energetically complete the one they’re leaving. They close loops. They clear emotional residue. They realign their energy field before they set a single goal. And you can absolutely do the same. As I share in The Emotion Behind Money , wealth is never created by logic alone. It comes from managing the emotions behind your money and understanding that money itself is energy. And in Awaken Your Wealth , I remind readers that energetic shifts begin when you consciously picture yourself stepping into a new reality, while compassionately acknowledging the one you’re standing in now. So let’s walk through the simple year-end process I teach my clients — one that spiritually, emotionally, and financially resets your money field for a powerful 2026. 1. Review Your 2025 Wins & Losses With Compassion Before you step into the new year, look back with the most loving, nonjudgmental eyes possible. I call it neutral observation . Wealthy people don’t spiral into shame when something didn’t go perfectly. They get curious. Ask yourself: Where did I expand financially this year? Where did I contract emotionally or economically? What choices were truly aligned with my values? Which ones came from fear, scarcity, or old patterns? In Awaken Your Wealth , the “Accepting Reality and Awakening” step of PACT teaches that awareness without judgment is how we break old money patterns for good. So breathe. Notice. Write it down. No shame. No spiral. Just truth. 2. Forgive Any Money Mistakes Here’s a truth most people never consider: Every financial mistake carries emotional weight and emotional weight blocks money flow. From my work in The 4 Spiritual Laws of Money , we know that your heart’s energy is more powerful than your brain’s logic, and intention is what redirects energy back into alignment. Forgiveness, of yourself, your past self, or others involved, releases stagnant money energy. Try this: Write down any money decisions from 2025 that still feel heavy. Place your hand on your heart. Say: "I forgive the version of me who made this choice. She/he did the best they could with what they knew at the time.” Forgiveness isn’t about letting mistakes slide. It’s about resetting your emotional money field so you can co-create something new. 3. Create an Energetic Closing Ceremony for the Year This is where wealthy people truly separate themselves; they honor the transition. You can create your own year-end ceremony using whatever resonates from your spiritual toolkit. Here are a few ideas inspired by the intention-setting and clearing practices throughout my work: Light a candle Symbolize releasing the old year and calling in the new. Write a “completion list” Include everything you’re ready to release: debts you’re no longer carrying shame over, relationships you’re energetically cutting cords from, patterns you’re finished reenacting. Burn or bury the list This physical act tells the Universe: “I’m done living from this version of myself.” In The Emotion Behind Money , we explore how inherited beliefs and emotional patterns repeat until they are consciously released. This ceremony is your line in the sand. End with intention Close with one powerful intention for 2026, aligned from your heart: “I choose a new flow of abundance.” “I trust that money comes to me with ease.” “I allow myself to receive the wealth I’ve been working toward.” As The 4 Spiritual Laws of Money reminds us: “The Universe responds to action.” Your ceremony is your spiritual action. Ready to Step Into 2026 Aligned, Clear & Empowered? If you’re craving deeper support with your financial reset, join me for my Emotions Behind Money Workshop in January. If you’ve been feeling the nudge to recalibrate your relationship with money, this is your moment. Let’s make 2026 the year your inner wealth and your financial reality finally match. You deserve abundance and you’re closer than you think. With love, alignment & a whole lot of possibility, Julie ✨
Abundance begins in the quiet moments of gratitude that open your heart and shift your
perspective.
By Julie Murphy November 4, 2025
Gratitude isn’t just about listing what you’re thankful for. It’s a frequency: an energetic vibration that aligns you with more of what you love.
How to End the Year Like the Wealthy Do
By Julie Murphy October 9, 2025
The way you end your year sets the energetic tone for how you’ll begin the next one.
Show More

Similar Blogs

By Julie Murphy December 10, 2025
Reset Your Money Energy for 2026 Every December, we all feel that pull, the desire to “be better with money next year.” But here’s the secret I’ve seen again and again after nearly three decades of walking alongside people from all walks of life: Financially wealthy people don’t just plan their next year — they energetically complete the one they’re leaving. They close loops. They clear emotional residue. They realign their energy field before they set a single goal. And you can absolutely do the same. As I share in The Emotion Behind Money , wealth is never created by logic alone. It comes from managing the emotions behind your money and understanding that money itself is energy. And in Awaken Your Wealth , I remind readers that energetic shifts begin when you consciously picture yourself stepping into a new reality, while compassionately acknowledging the one you’re standing in now. So let’s walk through the simple year-end process I teach my clients — one that spiritually, emotionally, and financially resets your money field for a powerful 2026. 1. Review Your 2025 Wins & Losses With Compassion Before you step into the new year, look back with the most loving, nonjudgmental eyes possible. I call it neutral observation . Wealthy people don’t spiral into shame when something didn’t go perfectly. They get curious. Ask yourself: Where did I expand financially this year? Where did I contract emotionally or economically? What choices were truly aligned with my values? Which ones came from fear, scarcity, or old patterns? In Awaken Your Wealth , the “Accepting Reality and Awakening” step of PACT teaches that awareness without judgment is how we break old money patterns for good. So breathe. Notice. Write it down. No shame. No spiral. Just truth. 2. Forgive Any Money Mistakes Here’s a truth most people never consider: Every financial mistake carries emotional weight and emotional weight blocks money flow. From my work in The 4 Spiritual Laws of Money , we know that your heart’s energy is more powerful than your brain’s logic, and intention is what redirects energy back into alignment. Forgiveness, of yourself, your past self, or others involved, releases stagnant money energy. Try this: Write down any money decisions from 2025 that still feel heavy. Place your hand on your heart. Say: "I forgive the version of me who made this choice. She/he did the best they could with what they knew at the time.” Forgiveness isn’t about letting mistakes slide. It’s about resetting your emotional money field so you can co-create something new. 3. Create an Energetic Closing Ceremony for the Year This is where wealthy people truly separate themselves; they honor the transition. You can create your own year-end ceremony using whatever resonates from your spiritual toolkit. Here are a few ideas inspired by the intention-setting and clearing practices throughout my work: Light a candle Symbolize releasing the old year and calling in the new. Write a “completion list” Include everything you’re ready to release: debts you’re no longer carrying shame over, relationships you’re energetically cutting cords from, patterns you’re finished reenacting. Burn or bury the list This physical act tells the Universe: “I’m done living from this version of myself.” In The Emotion Behind Money , we explore how inherited beliefs and emotional patterns repeat until they are consciously released. This ceremony is your line in the sand. End with intention Close with one powerful intention for 2026, aligned from your heart: “I choose a new flow of abundance.” “I trust that money comes to me with ease.” “I allow myself to receive the wealth I’ve been working toward.” As The 4 Spiritual Laws of Money reminds us: “The Universe responds to action.” Your ceremony is your spiritual action. Ready to Step Into 2026 Aligned, Clear & Empowered? If you’re craving deeper support with your financial reset, join me for my Emotions Behind Money Workshop in January. If you’ve been feeling the nudge to recalibrate your relationship with money, this is your moment. Let’s make 2026 the year your inner wealth and your financial reality finally match. You deserve abundance and you’re closer than you think. With love, alignment & a whole lot of possibility, Julie ✨
Abundance begins in the quiet moments of gratitude that open your heart and shift your
perspective.
By Julie Murphy November 4, 2025
Gratitude isn’t just about listing what you’re thankful for. It’s a frequency: an energetic vibration that aligns you with more of what you love.
How to End the Year Like the Wealthy Do
By Julie Murphy October 9, 2025
The way you end your year sets the energetic tone for how you’ll begin the next one.
It’s about creating an authentic relationship with money that actually supports the life you want.
By Julie Murphy September 11, 2025
When most people come to me for financial advice, they expect me to talk about budgets, investments, and strategies for building wealth.
Show More